Friday, October 23, 2015

Perpetual Buffering

Buffering is the worst. It gets all the more frustrating when you are trying to watch a tv show on netflix or hulu and every 3 seconds it stops and buffers. We all know that spinning circle of doom- and we all hate it. I mean, come on, we think we've got something good going with our internet company- we pay them, they guarantee we can have streaming of whatever we want! But we all know that's not true.
But isn't that life sometimes? You think you've got something good with someone, you think you are starting to understand them, get to know them. Then, all of a sudden they start buffering on you. It seems they just keep stopping to "think", leaving you in limbo to try and figure out when they are ever coming back. Maybe sometimes they don't, and eventually you give up and try to refresh the situation. There's only so much you can do. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. The worst part about the abrupt buffering is that there is no warning. There aren't any signs, sometimes, it just comes out of nowhere. And more often than not, that causes anger, instead of an attempt at trying to understand the situation. You might go through some stages- confusion, trying to understand from their perspective (then failing cause they gave you no explanation), crying, feeling betrayed, and usually hatred or anger starts to set in at the end there. Then you might just walk away; it's not worth the time or heart ache to stick around. There are other fish... I mean, internet companies out there. Move on, you deserve better than someone who ignores you and walks away without any explanation.
It hurts to get emotionally invested in something that keeps pausing on you, unsure on if it wants to continue or not. As much as you tell yourself you are just going to go with the flow and not let yourself get attached, we know that that is much easier said than done. If you have a heart, most likely you are going to care about that other person and become attached a little more as time goes on. That's why it hurts all the more when they pause. Racking your brain for what you could have possibly done different, done better, is pointless. If they don't want to have you and they do not have the decency to explain things to your face, then they are not worth your time or your heart ache. I believe that God puts some people in our lives to help us get closer to the other ones in our lives, and learn not to take them for granted. You always find out who your closest and dearest friends and family are when you are going through rough times.
On that note, though, there is someone who is never going to leave you, He will never abandon you. God loves you. He loves us all, so much, in fact, that he sent His only Son to die for all of us, because of our sin. He loves us so much and did not want us to suffer in eternal damnation because of that sin, that He sacrificed His only son. Find your joy in knowing that God is always going to be there, no matter what. No matter how many times you reject Him, no matter how many times you push Him away and tell yourself that you do not need Him or His salvation, He is never going to stop loving you. He will never turn His back on you. Having a perpetual savior is much better than dealing with life's perpetual buffering.

"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you." Deuteronomy 31:6

"The Steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." Lamentations 3:22-23

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