Saturday, September 10, 2016

Dreams Vs Reality

When I was a little girl, of course I dreamt of my wedding, but I had a completely different view of weddings. You never pay much attention to the drama when you are little - Just the pretty, nice things. I imagined that getting engaged would be so exciting and that everyone around us would be so excited and happy for us. I imagined that I would get to pick all the pretty frills and thrills, no matter the cost. (The concept of money was a little lost on me at that age). Most of all, though, I imagined that there would be so much love and support from others because two people in love and have decided that they want to spend the rest of their lives together.

What I did not think about, however, is the drastic effect that sin had on happy things. We are all sinful, so anger, jealousy, and selfishness overtake some. It comes from all angles, even my side. I have found that selfish ways tend to cloud people's actions, and they do not even see it. In our reality, some people cannot seem to bring themselves to simply be happy for us. We fell in love, albeit quickly, but everyone is different. We knew we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together and did not want to waste any more time being apart. We made decisions together on where we wanted to live and what we wanted to do with our life together because, as human beings with free will, we get to do that. Skepticism is understandable at first. It was a semi-quick engagement, But if you knew anything about us, or bothered to ask, you would know that we are taking steps with our pastor to ensure that we are ready for our marriage, not just the wedding part. And the details of that are no ones business but ours and our pastors.

I guess one of the biggest points I am trying to make is for those around the couples who are happily engaged. If you have an issue with them getting married, you can voice it (we all have free will), but there are ways to not be rude or bash people. Do not go assuming things left and right and accusing them of any wrong doing. I will never forget that when we first got engaged and announced our wedding date to be 6 months later someone accused me of being pregnant. I pride myself in my purity, and we both agree that sex is meant for marriage. And anyone who knows us should know that full well. So, as you can imagine, I was pretty offended. Please do not go around with your accusations. There are nice, pleasant ways to ask us why we are getting married so soon. The simple answer, we want to be married, why wait? Ultimately, those of you around and mostly those close to them have to make a choice. We only want to have supportive people in our lives, if we can help it. Life is too short for negative people and comments that tear people down. You can voice your opinion, we will take it into consideration, and if we do not agree, that is our decision, and we will all move on.

No one is perfect. I am sure that Jordan and I have gone about some things in a way that some people may not approve of. Forgive us, please. We are sinners and cannot be perfect and please everyone. But please, for the love of all that is good in this world, do yourselves a favor and do not be offended by every little thing. We make mistakes, it is a part of life. But is that really a life that you want to live- always having that anger and bitterness built up in you? I promise you, life will be much better off if you learn to let some things go - A lesson I am still learning myself.

In 55 days, the two will become one flesh.
"Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate." Mark 10:7-9
The two of us will "officially" become a we, even though we us that term to refer to us now because we are a team. We are partners in life. The decision making together starts now. We will be by each others sides for the rest of our lives, no matter what anyone else has to say about it. We are there for each other- to cherish and protect- as long as we both shall live. We love each other. So please, support the couples who are going about things God's way and trying to find their joy in life, together.

So, no, my wedding planning is not going as originally dreamt when I was 8 years old. I do not have an unlimited budget like I thought I would. There are stresses in life I had not calculated in. Being an adult is hard. What IS going as planned is that I found an amazing man of God, who guides me toward Christ and loves me as Christ loves the church.
Fairy tale wedding? I'd much rather have a biblical, God fearing marriage. And I am pretty sure that is just what I am getting. Thanks be to God for putting Jordan in my life when he did. I love him with all of my heart. And while I may have other accomplishments in life, I believe that being his wife and walking with God together is going to be my favorite and top accomplishment. He truly is the joy in my life that I was not always sure I would get.

"For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its savior... Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word." Ephesians 5:22, 25-26

1 comment:

  1. I'm extremely happy for you and Jordan and wish you a lifetime of happiness together! :)