What are you doing with your life?

It has become a common saying among some of my friends. "What are you doing with your life?", we ask each other, in usually sarcastic tones, almost daily. But, in all seriousness, what ARE we doing with our lives? Oh, I have a suggestion! How about finding joy in it? Yeah, there is that whole finding a job thing, making a living, figuring out how to support the family you hope to have, but what is all  that if you do not have joy?
Here's a clip from the movie "The Bucket List". Morgan Freeman's character asks two questions that we should really ask ourselves as well. Granted, we may or may not be close to death, but it's good to think about, regardless.

"Have you found joy in your life?"
"Has your life brought joy to others?"
So, ask yourself. Finding joy in life is different for everyone; Being around family and friends, learning new things, bringing the message of God to others, among other things. Those of you who know me know that it does not take much to make me smile. I find joy in the little things. The sunset over the lake, the smell of fall coming, looking up at the stars and basking in the wonder and glory of God's creation. I know that God loves me, and that brings me joy, as it should to you.

John 13: 34 "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another."

So how can you bring joy to others? By showing God's love to them. These are not difficult questions, as Jack Nicholson's character seems to make them. First, you find the joy in your life. Think of it this way, God has put everything in your life, so you can find your joy through Him. Trust that He is going to give you what you need. Second, you take that joy in Christ and you show it to others. It's as simple as that.
So, again, what are you doing with your life? You do not need this great, extravagant plan to make a million dollars or cure a disease. Just find the things that make you happy, they can be big or small, and then go out and show them to other people, and encourage them to find the things that make them happy too.

" Yet I will rejoice in the Lord; I will take joy in the God of my salvation." Habakkuk 3:18

12 years later...

I know this is a day late but I thought this would be a good poem anyway. In remembrance of all those who lost their lives on that terrible day, 12 years ago. And for all those loved ones we have lost in the time between then and now.

"If tomorrow starts without me, and I'm not there to see;
If the sun should rise and find your eyes all filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't cry the way you did today,
While thinking of the many things we didn't get to say.

I knew how much you love me,
As much as I love you.
And each time you think of me, know you'll miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me, Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name, and took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready in heaven far above
And that I'd have to leave behind all those I dearly love.

But as I turned to walk away, a tear fell from my eye
For all my life I'd always thought, I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for, so much yet to do
It seemed almost impossible that I was leaving you.

I thought of all the yesterdays,
the good ones and the bad.
I thought of all the love we shared, and all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday, just even for a while
I'd say goodbye and kiss you and maybe see you smile.

But then I fully realized
That this can never be.
For emptiness and memories would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things I might miss, come tomorrow
I thought of you and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow
But when I walked through heaven's gates,
I felt so much at home

When God looked down and smiled at me,
From this great golden throne,
He said "This is eternity, and all I've promised you"
Today for life on earth is past, but here it starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow, but today will always last
And since each day's the same way, there's no longing for the past

But you have been so faithful,
So trusting and so true.
Though there were times you did some things you knew you shouldn't do.
But you have been forgiven, and now at last you are free.
So won't you take my hand are share my life with me?

So when tomorrow starts without me,
Don't think we are far apart.
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here in your heart."

Let's start over

I know it's been a while since I've written anything. The summer was so busy that I barely had time to get all my thoughts together in a blog post, while using the "sophisticated" vocabulary I wanted to, and all that jazz. I could tell you all about what has been going on in my life but, if any of you know me at all, you know that I do not really like writing about that kind of stuff in this blog, but since it's the beginning of a new school year again, I guess I can take a little time to tell you about the new things going on. After all,  It's like we are starting all over.
My summer was crazy busy with 2 summer jobs and a lot of trips around the U.S for weddings and a family reunion. I was so fortunate to get to go and try all these new things. At our family reunion we went zip-lining and white water rafting, and they were both a blast! And it was such a blessing to get to do that with my awesome family! On another note, it was great being home for 3 months with my family and friends, and I'm going to miss it, but it's time, and I'm ready, to get back to another year in the Arctic. (But seriously, though, its freezing up here!)
I cannot wait to see what God has in store for me this year. He has blessed me with some great opportunities for this year, especially to be involved with campus ministry, and I know He will guide me through it. If you're the praying kind, which I'm guessing if you're still reading my blog at this point that you are, then your prayers would be very appreciated! I really am trying to make it a point to write more, it's like my outlet for anything that comes up in my life that's bothering me or if I think the lessons I've learned from my experiences could benefit someone else.
So, until next time, which will hopefully be sooner rather than later, God's blessings and I will leave you with a bible verse that I think goes with this year pretty well. (and it's also just my favorite verse)

Philippians 4: 6, 13
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God...  I can do all things through him who gives me strength.

The Green-Eyed Monster

Envy... Jealousy... One of the 7 deadly sins, right? Well, we are all sinners, everyone gets jealous. But, just because everyone else jumped off of a cliff, would you go with them? I know, kind of a cliche analogy that everyone uses. But, seriously, what do you do when someone very close to you, like your best friend, takes something you considered "yours". Here's a scenario that might help:

Say that you are really good at volleyball. You're really passionate about it and you are always talking about how you want to make varsity and be a starter. One of your best friends plays other sports, not volleyball, and with that they are merely hobbies, and your friend is not very passionate about them. All of the sudden, they try out for volleyball, make varsity, and are starting, while you are stuck on JV for another year. You are left feeling betrayed by your best friend and feeling like no one notices your talent anymore because that friend came in and just swept that red carpet right out from under you.

Naturally, your first reaction would probably be one of anger toward your best friend. She knew what you had been planning, you talked about it all of the time. Besides, she already was good at everything that she ever did. Everything school related; everything music related; pretty much everything she ever picked up. Why couldn't she just leave your passion alone? She has all of these other things, this was yours. So, then jealousy sets in because everyone starts to congratulate her on the great job she is doing. And you sit there, trying to be happy for her, but listening to one compliment after another you cringe. Everyone is calling her "super-star" and completely ignoring the fact that you have been doing this most of your life, and are just as good.

Trust me, your jealousy is going to eat you up inside. We are only human, so yes, this is going to come first. But, we must remember this verse from Galatians:
"Now the works of my flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control; against such things there is no law... let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another." Galatians 5:19-23; 26

So, yes, it may seem like you have been betrayed by your best friend and like no one cares about your talent, but do NOT think that. God cares about each and every one of us individually. He knows each of our talents, heck, He gave them to us. God wants us to be loving, patient, and kind to our neighbor, even if they do us wrong like this. In doing this, you will find peace withing yourself, and your feelings of jealousy and anger will subside. They may come back, but that is just the devil trying to attack you. Stay strong, and know that God is right there with you and that He cares about each and everyone of us. Also, look at yourselves to see that you are not the best friend in this situation. If you find that you are, talk to your friend so that the hard feelings between you two can be forgiven and forgotten.

God calls us to forgive and He has forgiven us, and to love our neighbors as He loves us. So, put aside your feelings of jealousy and rage, or possibly your feelings of being this high and mighty "super-star" and remember that we are all Children of God, created in His own image, and we are all humble servants of His. Then, you will find the joye meant for you in life.

The Good, the Bad, and the Crazy

If gas wasn't so expensive, I would drive all around this town; to all the good places, the good memories, and even some of the bad ones too. There comes a point when you realize that most of your bad memories started with something good, and then something went wrong. In some cases, terribly wrong. Nonetheless, you can go to those places where memories were made, and if you sit there long enough, the good parts will come back to you. They always do, and sometimes, that may not be such a bad thing.

You see, 8 months ago I was absolutely ready to wipe the dust of this not so small town off of my feet and get far far away. Why? Because I was tired of seeing all the places that had bad connotations with them, I was tired of seeing people who reminded me of bad times, and I was tired of seeing places that reminded me of people and bad times. I wanted a fresh start, a clean slate, and to go somewhere where no one had any expectations for me because they didn't know my past, they didn't know the mistakes I had made.

But, here I am, 8 months later at spring break, and I am slowly realizing that in some ways, this town, the places, the people, the memories; maybe they aren't all that bad. Maybe my mind was clouded by all of the things I thought were bad memories, but now that I have had some time to clear my head, away from here, I've realized the importance of all the mistakes I made, and the mistakes that were made involving me. I've realized that once I looked back on things, I was able to see that there was a lesson learned there, whether I saw it before or not, and that is going to affect how I go through life, regardless. So, if I had the resources, I would drive around, remembering all of the good, the bad, and the crazy because they are what made me into the woman I am today. The woman who, 8 months ago, couldn't wait to get away from this town, and now, is taking more pride in this town and what it offered me while I was here.

God showed me that I need to appreciate what I have, while I have it, ultimately leading to joy in life.